Enhancing Your Relationship

By WEEK Producer

July 13, 2010 Updated Jul 13, 2010 at 2:46 PM CDT

Everyone wants to have the perfect relationship, but are you doing what it takes to create that type of relationship in your life? Before you can have a healthy relationship, it is essential that you know what it looks like, and realize that it takes devotion and work Tonight we will explore the topic and give you some ideas to enhance your life.

We all want good relationships, but why do so many relationships fail?

Dr. Joy: People fail to put in the work and devotion that is needed in a relationship. Whatever is valuable to you takes time, commitment and practice. If you want a relationship to endure, you must be willing to value what it takes to maintain its health.

What are some of the key components of a healthy relationship?

Dr. Joy:
A relationship that is built on negotiation and compromise
A relationship that accepts differences versus one that demands changes in your partner
A relationship in which each person can see the other through his or her individual points of view.
A relationship that shows respect, honor and commitment

Conflicts arise in every relationship, but what are some tips for those who want to handle them effectively?

Dr. Joy:
Deal with one issue at a time. It might be tempting to go through all of your grievances in the midst of an argument, but deal with one thing at a time to resolve conflict.

Really listen to your partner. Focus on really “hearing” what your partner is saying vs. focusing on your response or defending your position.

Edit your conversation. Just because you think something, you don’t have to say it. Decide if saying something is helpful, non-hurtful, and meaningful to the conversation.

Realize sometimes it is best to just move on. It might be hard to admit, but sometimes there just isn’t a solution, and the best decision is to just “agree to disagree.”

Look for a win-win philosophy. Healthy relationships have no losers. Each person should feel heard, and feel as though they both are winners in the relationship discussion.

Fight fair. The key is to focus on the fact that you love your partner and remember there is no hitting below the belt. That means, no name-calling, no attacking, no hitting, and accepting your part in the disagreement.

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