Ask Dr. Joy: friendships, dilemmas and solutions

By WEEK Producer

October 9, 2013 Updated Oct 9, 2013 at 6:59 PM CDT

Friendships…women need them, but they are difficult to maintain. Friendships are desirable, but many times we hit bumps in the road with our friends. Tonight we will look at friendships and some tips for maintaining them.

Women love their friends, but what is the truth about friendships?

• Research shows that women are reluctant to talk about the bumps in their relationships with BFFs but losing friends, having difficulties and having no friends at all is very common.

• Disappointments in relationships and misunderstandings can result in some of our highest and lowest emotional cycles.

• Friends typically turn over every 7 years.

What are some tips for friendships that might be hitting some bumps?

• Communication: Perhaps you haven’t talked for a week, or you feel ignored, summon up courage and address the situation. If there is any hope of saving this relationship, you need to work out the kinks.

• Make an apology: If you know you have hurt your friends’ feelings, don’t wait, make the first step and apologize. Make sure you acknowledge what you have done wrong, how you have hurt her, and what you will do to remedy the situation.

• If someone has hurt you. Be the big person and accept the apology with grace. If the relationship is worth saving accept her apology and forgive. If the behavior is repeated then you might want to move from the relationship

• Recess: Relationships sometimes get heated and a time out is in order. Talk to your friend, or text and set a time to talk about it in a day or two. Don’t put it off for too long or resentments and hurt feelings just might grow.

• Reconsider if necessary. Some friends outgrow each other. Perhaps your common interests have faded. Hopefully, you can find some new interests, but if not, perhaps find limited time to socialize and appreciate what you can give to each other, even though the relationship has changed.